horriblescope

I saw this horoscope awhile ago, on a screen behind a coffee stand, but it's so great:

"Life's little mysteries enrich the world. So stop trying to solve them all."

Ok. Be frivolous ..

Look at these coats I saw in Massachusetts when I was there for Christmas ...



and these great rain boots, which I didn't get and then got by mail order after most of the rain had passed, and now I pray for rain ...


For no reason:  I've always loved this picture of my boy Rasputin, where he looks partially desaturated, as if he's been colorized badly .. like his tail and elbows were hanging out of the frame .. and then he whipped his tail back in, but it was still in black and white.



And then there's the story of Christian the lion who these two guys kept as a pet and then released into the wild in Africa, and then when they went back to visit him a couple years later, he jumped up and hugged them like a little house cat.

Here are some photos before they set him free ..



He came back, thus he is theirs.

Late. sleep. unemployment. dreams ZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

electile dysfunction

Ah, the George W. Bush years .. wasn't that something?

Now that we can truly laugh about it - he's just days away from being out of the White House forever!! - I thought I'd share this little ray of sunshine, the chalkboard specials at the Black Sheep Cafe in Amherst, MA, October, 2004:

ELECTILE DYSFUNCTION
$6.95

The Burning Bush - JERK chicken with green chilis, pepper jack cheese, lettuce, tomato and spicy lime vinaigrette on a baguette.

The Challahburton - Lots of PORK loin with pear chutney, spinach, roasted red peppers, red onion on challah. (accompanying illustration: smiling pig reclining with feet up on large sacks of money, staring at oil barrels)

The Big Dick Cheney - An OVERCOMPENSATING amount of Black Forest smoked turkey, cheddar cheese, sliced apples, red pepper mustard, lettuce, tomato on a baguette.

The Ronald Dumsfeld - An OFFENSIVE amount of 5-spice baked tofu, spicy hoisin peanut sauce, pickled carrots, lettuce, scallions, roasted garlic sauce on a baguette.

Wolfowitz in Sheep's Clothing - AGRESSIVELY spiced kafta (ground lamb patties) with yogurt dressing, lettuce, tomato, onions, cucumbers in a pita.

(final illustration: a sheep dropping a vote into a ballot box)

And in the bakery section, they offered Republican Convention Cookies (filled with fruits and nuts).

thank you, London

... for the atheist bus campaign

don't quit your day jobs

my week, on fast forward:

Sunday: six mile hike in Griffith Park, at night with a head lamp .. kind of felt like lying in bed thinking about taking a hike, except I had company.

Monday and Tuesday: ten hours in the dentist's chair, with my dippy student shooting novocaine in the wrong nerve, out the other side of my gums and down my throat, etc.

Wednesday: lunch at the Alcove, spent reading all the notes in the chess table drawers (all new since I read them last .. they must periodically chuck them)


highlights:

“I like alcove and I like yogurt.
Sometimes I heal and sometimes I hurt.
Life is cruel and life is sweet.
If only my food were here so I could eat.
Days go by and people move on.
I only hope that ..
Oh wait. My food is here now.”

“Even though you cheated on me w/ur sister’s best friend, I forgive you.”

“Lunch was delicious. Off to Target! –Giselle.” (deep one. Go Giselle.)

“last night sucked! Wow!”

“Who would have thought I’d become a high school teacher? I was always such a fuck-up”

“I have nothing interesting to say.” (Well, thanks for clarifying.)

“I shot myself @ work & had to go home.”

“I just texted the wrong boy the wrong message oops!”

“what is the life span of a jellyfish? I wonder if they are monogamous like penguins – do they even mate?”

“It is better to want what you can’t have than have what you don’t want.” (hear hear.)

“Dear Jamie, tonight I spill my blood, until the last drop I think of you. The whole (sic) you left I cannot fill. I cannot go on. Drew” (hope he’s kidding.)

more:

















Today: bought a car. ditched the Hawaiian seat covers pretty quick, for the record.


kind of like my old car. well, at least I know what I like.

I met this guy coming out of the subway in Long Beach.


I saw these tables




and this chair


and this window display



waiting for my mechanix to get my new car to pass smog


now I’m eating cookies.

there it is.

epiphany

i've been laid off right before the holidaze, SAG's about to strike, virtually no one i know is working, it's rainy and desperate outside, and i feel like shit.
I feel like I've been dumped. my heart hurts, and i want to soak in a hot bath and read by candlelight.

what happened to all the frivolous stuff? i've done nothing all year but work. and think.

so i'm vowing not to work (except fun stuff, but nothing just for money) until i get hired back onto the show in january.

and i'm gonna quit saying things for awhile and post more pictures.
and i'm gonna quit thinking, and paint.
and i'm gonna quit scribbling down bands i want to get albums by, and play guitar.


and i'm gonna tear out pictures from vogue, and make clothes.
and sleep.
and drink wine.

brave new world

Invigorated by the election of Barack Obama, I’ve composed a list of things heretofore thought improbable that now might on Barack’s coat-tails seep into the realm of possibility:

1. world peace
2. total resuscitation of Walt Disney’s cryogenic head
3. life on other planets
4. global unwarming
5. a Michael Jackson comeback
6. corporate responsibility
7. a new ice age
8. a SAG / AMPTP agreement in which the actors don’t get royally screwed
9. plastic zippers that don’t break
10. resolution by the religious masses that homosexuals are actual human beings and, thus, deserve equal rights
11. affordable rent in cities that have anything worthwhile going on
12. a fountain of youth
13. arbitrary absolution of my student loans
14. more dinosaurs
15. pregnant men
16. truth in advertising
17. the second coming of Christ (or the first, really)
18. an epidemic of healthfulness
19. spontaneous reunion of all missing socks to their mates
20. poltergeists
21. abolition of internet pop-up ads
22. … and spam
23. free lunch
24. talking dogs
25. flying cars
26. bionic limbs
27. commuter hovercrafts
28. atheist rights
29. time travel
30. teleportation
31. a plausible explanation for crop circles
32. adolescent contentment
33. free flowing traffic on the 405
34. Santa Claus
35. t-shirt tags that don’t itch
36. more cowbell
37. true love

the Hogwarts school of U.S. politix

If the U.S. political parties were houses at Hogwarts ..

the GOP would be Slytherin
the Democratic party would be Gryffindor
the Green party = Ravenclaw
Libertarian party = Hufflepuff

thanks to Senta Erbe for noticing that one ..

and then, of course, we have The High Inquisitor ..